February 19, 2009

He just doesn't get it. . .

My husband does not understand blogging. Well, at least the way I do it.

When I first got started I only read a few blogs. All of people I know. Then my list expanded. To people I knew, haven't spoken to in years, but found a link for their blog on one of my other friends. Thus began the stalking. But I knew them, in a previous life, yes, but still. And my husband understood that. I am not good at staying in touch with people. This was an excellent way to do that. That was fine with him. It wasn't weird at all.

Until the day that I discovered Mormon Mommy Blogs. And that it was possible to read a blog just because you wanted to! You didn't have to know the person! And even more exciting: it was socially acceptable to COMMENT on a perfect strangers blog! Not only acceptable but appreciated! Who knew? And thus began the addiction. I read blogs for at least an hour everyday.

This is where he just doesn't understand. He will come in to see what I am doing. (Why he bothers asking is totally beyond me.) And he looks at the blog I'm reading and asks:
Who's blog is this?
Me: (as I scroll up and point to the picture) Hers.
Him: Do you even know this person?
Me: Well, no . . .
Him: (walking away, muttered under his breath) weird.

Now, while I feel a little bit judged, I get over it and just keep blogging. Until this little experience:
I won a giveaway. Chocolate chip cookies from the lovely Carolyn to be exact. And I never win anything. So I was pretty dang excited. Now, who better to share my excitement with than my husband, right? WRONG.
Me: I won chocolate chip cookies!
Him: What?
Me: I won a giveaway on a blog!
H: Whose?
M: Her name is Carolyn. She lives in Virginia.
H: Is she making the cookies?
M: Yes.
H: Do you even know this person?
M: Well, we have never met. . .
H: Are you going to eat them? I don't think that you should eat them. You don't even know here. You have never met. I don't think that you should eat something someone made that you don't even know. *
M: (changing the subject, trying to fight back the annoyance at not being able to share my excitement, but instead having it crushed and thrown away.)

So a couple days later the cookies arrive. And they are marvelous. Yes, I ate them. My husband's pessimism did nothing to deter that. And to show what a big person I am I offered him one:
M: Seriously, you should try one.
H: No, that's okay.
M: What do you think, she poisoned them?
H: (shrugging)
M: Fine. When I am NOT sick tomorrow, you try one and see what you are missing out on.

And I was not sick tomorrow. In the least little bit. And I was kind enough to leave a few cookies for him. He, however, did not take advantage of that and they sat on the counter a little too long for my willpower to take. So I ate them all. And enjoyed every last crumb.

And as for my husband, well, he continues to judge and still doesn't get it. These women out there in blogging land, they aren't just abstract people hanging out there in the void. These people have become my friends. I may not know their voices, but I do know their struggles. I know their joys. I know that they are stinking hilarious. I know that they try to be good people and sometimes don't meet up to their own expectations. I know their insecurities and a few of their faults. I know that they love their children just as much as I love mine, and I know that their children annoy them almost as much as mine do me. And a lot of these women know these things about me. So, I'm pretty sure that while I have never seen their faces I can call these women friends.

Get it now, honey?

*Carolyn, I didn't doubt your cookies for a second. And seriously, if you wanted to you could send me the recipe.


Heidi Ashworth said...

Hear Hear! You said this so darn stinkin' well! Love it!

Carolyn said...

He He He...I'm famous...at least my cookies are.

Honestly I only know one 'real' person who blogs...if not for strangers I would have no online friends...you very much among them.

I will post the the cookie recipe today or tomorrow...or sometime really soon when I remember to have my cookbook and computer in the same room.

3 Peas in a Pod said...

My husband is the same way only he mostly keeps his comments to himself...about this subject anyway!! Sometimes he voices his opinion and it's never pretty. He too thinks I'm weird but oh well. Just because I've never seen your face in person doesn't mean you're not my friend. Duh! Leave it to a guy to squash a woman's dreams just because he doesn't "get it". Doesn't mean it's not real.

Are you on Facebook? A few of my bloggy friends are on there and that somehow makes them real people to my husband. I am so thankful that I found blogging. I told one of my friends about my blog and she turned her nose up at it...so I changed the subject. No one else knows about my blog except for my hubby. Fine with me. I have a BUNCH of bloggy friends whom I love and you're one of them! :-) Don't let the hubby ruin your excitement. I'll bet the cookies were to die for. My mouth is watering just thinking about them!!

Much love from NJ,

Mallory said...

LOL, I totally agree! My hubby thinks I am so strange, but he deals with it. I'm always starting conversations like, "So, this lady who's blog I read..." or "I read on this blog..." or something very similar. I can't help it. I'm stuck at home all day with a baby who doesn't talk yet. I need to find some place to get away. That place happens to be the blog world!

That Girl in Brazil said...

I sorta-kinda blogged for like six months - just reading people I knew and keeping family and friends updated.

Then I did what you did - started reading my friends' lists ... and their lists ... and THEIR lists .... and now for a good eight months now I've been hooked.

My hubby gets it NOW, but it took a lot of explaining.

We should make a blog for all the blogging widowers out there to complain about us.

Emily said...

My husband doesn't seem to care about who's blog I'm reading, as long as I don't spend all day doing it. :)

This is a great post. I love making new friends online (and in person, too). :)

Jenna Consolo said...

Don't worry. HE doesn't get it, but WE all do! Let him be sad and lonely in Scroogeland. I would have eaten those cookies. What, did he not know that sometimes the bakers in the back of grocery stores spit in the dough? :)


Melinda said...

Husbands don't get a lot of stuff. ;) I LOVE that you ate the cookies, and you were so funny about it! Well, he missed out! haha You should have left a note for him saying if the cookies killed you, to give Carolyn's blog address to the police! hehehehehe

wendy said...

You wrote that very beautifully. "I don't know their voices, but I know their struggles" how beautiful is that!! I feel very much the same way.

wonder woman said...

We have had very similar conversations in our house. Now I talk about bloggers all the time that Levi knows who I'm talking about when I mention certain ones.

congrats on the giveaway!

also known as shell said...

I feel the same. I love to blog stalk, find new friends that i have no other connection to other than I enjoy the stories they write about their lives

Copyright Trapped Between a Scream and a Hug

Meaning all content on this blog is mine. So you better not steal it. Seriously.