July 14, 2009

RE: golf is not my favorite

Dear Person who organized the Overstock golf tournament,

I don't like you. Let's just get that out of the way right now. I really, really don't like the way your mind works.

Have you ever played golf before? Do you understand the way the game works? Despite the fact that I have actually never played anything other than mini golf at the local course, I do know a few specifics about the game. For example, were you aware that golf is nothing like basketball? For one thing, a basketball game lasts 1 or 2 hours, tops. A golf game, on the other hand, at least 3 hours. And that's when you're only playing 9 holes. Also, you know how basketball is free? Just find an empty court at a park or, hey, someone willing to give you the keys to the church, and you have a place to play. Golf, however, runs between $20 to $30 a round. Do you see the difference?

I have to ask, do you really think that pool play is necessary in a golf tournament? Or DOUBLE ELIMINATION? Really? Really? I know that Overstock has a decent population of single employees, who have nothing better to spend their money on than a weekly round of golf, but my husband doesn't fall into that category. Oh, no he doesn't. And just so you know, the amount of money that my husband has spent over the past month playing golf in your tournament, it could have fed us for a week. Did you catch that? A WEEK.

Now, I know your wondering why, if I am so concerned about the money, don't I talk to my husband, persuade him not to play. . . You're a male, you should understand this. Dangle a trophy in front of my husband's nose and there is very little in this world to drag him away from the chance to win it.

So, in order to win yourself back into my good graces, next year organize a 2 man golf scramble. One Saturday in the spring. And call it good. Otherwise, your going to have the Overstock wives on your back, and let me tell you, that is NOT a position that you want to be in.


Momza said...

::::APPLAUSE::: Well said!! Hear! hear!

Linds said...

I'm going to have to steal your "golf sucks" image to send to my golf pro husband. I hear you girl!

Kristina P. said...

Fortunately, my husband only plays golf rarely.

Carolyn said...

So glad my DH is not into golf.

Liz @ Sugarplum Creations said...

Ha! Luckily my husband doesn't play golf. But the expense that comes with being an avid hunting/fisher man??? Ay yi yi. I feel your pain.

Rachelle said...

LOL! Priceless...LOL! Amen, amen, amen!

Debbie said...

I'm glad my hubby doesnt golf. Other things that take up time, yes, but golf, no. Great letter.

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